As we enter the fifth year of the pandemic lockdown, Zoom has eclipsed Amazon as the most valuable company on the stock exchange. They’ve done this by adding many new products that take advantage of the Zoom technology, but they admit that the inspiration came from bad puns provided by the founder’s wise-guy younger brother. Below, a selection from their latest catalog.

Zoombah: This is essentially Roomba, the floor cleaning robot, fitted with a Zoom app that runs continuously and travels around every inch of your house broadcasting everything you do. It results in a kind of reality show that all your Zoom friends can log into at any time. Of course, there’s a shutoff switch to hide your more private moments, but most people forget to hit it during arguments, misdemeanors, or embarrassing moments. It’s a hoot!

Baby Zoomer: Just drop this into your nine month old’s crib to enable the baby to make her own playdates! All she has to do is hit the giant button and she’s Zoom-connected to a random baby friend. Available with choice of pink or blue button.

ExZoom: Trying to “dig up” an old flame? Now you can “exhume” with ExZoom, the smart Zoom app that tracks down that old girlfriend or boyfriend and connects you instantly. What a great way to surprise that formerly special person who dropped you like a rock during your formative years!

WoomZoom: Why wait until your sonogram to see and hear your little bundle-of-joy to be? With WombZoom you can see, talk, listen, and play Bach to make the baby extra smart at birth. Baby can skip year one and go right into year two of Mommy and Me class."